Everyone knows that TiVo is the greatest thing ever invented. That fire and the wheel were mere preludes to the day that I could spend a Sunday afternoon in Queens dragooned into helping my mother get her seasonal clothes into/out of the attic with the understanding that Sunday night I would be left alone to watch the prerecorded Saints game in a brisk 90 minutes. Still, every day I find that TiVo disappoints me.
For instance, I can no longer watch, on a TiVo enabled television, a commercial. I will press fast forward until blood starts to pool under the nail of my button pressing finger, so spoiled have I become. Also, if I change the channel and find myself in the middle of a show that I would have liked to have seen the beginning of I look to the heavens and bellow “TiVo, why have you forsaken me?”
In other words, I now blame a piece of home electronics precariously balanced atop my television for being unable to bend time to my whim. And I feel justified every time.
Just as a side note, the television show that inspired this was Lidia’s Family Table. I tuned in while she was making a shrimp and scallop gratinate and lobster brodetto. At the time, I was eating canned salmon. Directly from the can.
