Where Sam doesn't play anymore ...Rick's Cafe Americain

Yes, I know all about Ricky Ray Rector. Spare me the “Democrats do it also” line and just look at the Supreme Court voting on the issue. Thanks.

First, a comment on the Democratic Party. It seems that one of the reactions to the nationwide ass-kicking the party took is to tack right on issues like abortion and gay marriage. Surrender? Is that the best that the party can come up with? Throughout the election season the Democrats were criticized for being French. Who knew that Vichy France was the real model. Can’t this party get anything right? Bah. Back to talking about me.

I batted .500 today on stage. I think this may have been the first time that I did two shows in one night. It was interesting to see the contrast in reactions. The 7PM show at The Duplex went very well. The Duplex gets a real audience, and a real audience is usually a lure for some good comics. (How do you build an audience for an open mic? -ed Apparently two-for-one drinks during happy hour.) I did a solid six minute set and was invited back for next week.  The show at The Village Lantern? Not so good. I hung out with some pals, but I didn’t get on until half the room left. And then I just sort of mailed it in. A callback joke I wanted to open with fell apart when the comic I was calling back to left while I was waiting to perform. The concept of a slightly stale alternative opening (that worked at The Duplex) was met with silence and I didn’t have the heart to follow through and just tell the joke. BOOOO, Ugarte! If I’m going to do this (and I am) I am going to have to develop a little more follow through. As another sad appendix, at both shows I screwed up a joke I wrote that afternoon about my lack of internet access, but I think there is something there and I will find it.

After the show I headed up to A.M. for a little no-limit ring (blinds at .25/.50). I know that my poker writing has been sparse lately. That’s because I haven’t been playing often, and when I have I haven’t been playing well. I haven’t been playing often because I am performing on tournament night, and the guys moved the side game from Monday night(convenient!) to Sunday night (not so much). And I’ve been getting killed on the river on Party Poker. (On the upside, Zinester finished 114th out of more than 1500 in the “New Player” tournament after she started a Party account. And she has been cashing at a high rate in the $5+1 SNGs into which she has tentatively dipped her toe. Oh Lord, what have I done.)

Tonight was pretty good, though. I bought in for $20 and quickly frittered away $8 before things turned around. Pocket Kings turned into a set on the flop, and they held up after I reraised all-in. On the next hand, I got pocket Aces. I raised to $2, JCatz reraised to $5 and I pushed. JCatz quickly called with AK (he is both an excellent player AND a gambler) and let out a healthy “Fuck!” when he saw the bullets. Eights fell on the flop and an Ace on the turn gave me the boat. And suddenly I’m sitting on almost $50.

I finished the night with $35. It could have been much worse. On three separate hands I caught a piece of the flop but laid down the hand when JCatz, sitting on my immediate left, pushed in behind me. On all three hands he had me beat. I am mostly very happy with my play here.

Hand one, A5 vs. A4. I knew my ace was better than his (With a 5? -ed. Yes.), but the four on the river scared me. And I was right.

Hand two, K3 vs. 8x. The flop was K88.  I bet $2 and he called. The turn was a brick. I bet another $4 and then called the raise to $10. With the eights, I figured even if I was outkicked, the board would make the kickers moot. The river wasn’t high enough for me to feel good about my kicker, though, so I laid it down when he pushed. I probably shouldn’t have called the turn, but dodged a bullet when I folded the river.

Hand three, Q4 vs. QT. Again I caught TPNK in the blind and bet from early position. This may not seem like the sharpest thing to do, but JCatz will bet with nothing if he senses weakness. If you don’t try to get information by betting, you may as well just fold because a bet is coming in behind you and Q4 is just not a calling hand. He called the flop and then raised me on the turn. I knew my 4 was no good, and again I got away.

Anyone can play KK or AA by getting all of their chips into the middle. I’m glad I was able to read that I was beat and get away from some very dangerous hands. Now if only I could do this online…

My first comedy connection through poker with the improv crew: one of the players helps run a Thursday night show at R Bar in Williamsburgh. I can’t make it tomorrow or Thanksgiving, but I’ll be there on December 2. It will go on the schedule soon.

First: At the risk of offending Signor Ferrari’s sensibilities, I will note that Stay Free! subscriptions, always a great gift, are even better for the holidays. Zinester has put together a great holiday offer, including a Christmas music compilation that, as sure as it cleared the frost off of my Jew heart, will get you in the holiday spirit. Or something. Order now. Don’t make me ask again. Because I will.

Second: Although Francis told the world that his book would be available “soonish”, I found out that his book was available now via Daniel that it is available now. His book, The Holy Tango of Literature, is a collection of poems written in the style of famous poets if, instead of engaging the world and its mysteries, they wrote poems inspired by anagrams of their own names. You can sample his work at the late, lamented Modern Humorist - the first and only outlet to pay me for my writing. (Don’t look for it; it never ran on the site.) I am particularly fond of his take on William Carlos Williams. You can order the book here.

Third and last: You can expect more aggressive promotion of this as we get closer to the date, but I am producing a Thursday night comedy open mic at Ripple, my local watering hole in Prospect Heights. The debut is on December 9 at 7:30.

I am also looking to integrate a “reading series” element to the show in the spirit of Little Gray Books or Trampoline Hall. This part of the show will be booked, so if you have a polished five to six minute piece that you are interested in reading—fiction or non-fiction—let me know.

Thank you for your time.

I found Mother, May I Sleep With Treacher through the late, lamented The Minor Fall, The Major Lift (which I link only for its excellent blogroll). I didn’t even know he was conservative until election time rolled around and he started letting his RedState-flag fly. What is a good conservative joke, you ask? This is.

Karol turned me on to Jeff Goldstein at Protein Wisdom. There is tons of good stuff, but The Martha Stewart Chronicles alone are worth the price of admission. I wish they had a category link, but you should just scroll and read them all.

Ace of Spades, another fave of Karol’s, can be very funny—like when he wrote this—but he is too frothily conservative for me to read all the time. I don’t like being yelled at by him any more than I figure he would appreciate being yelled at by me.

You may know Patton Oswalt since he has a supporting role on King of Queens, but his standup is brilliant and nothing like sitcom comedy. And he has a great blog. He is based in L.A., so I’m not sure when I’ll get to see him myself.

Eugene Mirman is just hysterical, and he produces a Wednesday night show at Rififi on 12th St and 2d Ave. (next to Veniero’s) for only $5. He has some great videos on his website. Also, I think I may have mentioned that he is interviewed by Francis in the latest Stay Free! Find out where to get a copy here.

Rick Shapiro has to be seen to be believed. It is entirely possible that an open mic is the best place to see him, because his act is just too over-the-top for the mainstream crowds that go to regular comedy clubs. Genius, though. I plan on catching his Thursday night show at The Village Ma soon.

Demetri Martin is just a really fucking smart comic. He often does Eugene’s show at Rififi, so that is a good place to catch him.

Just find these guys where you can.