Rick's Cafe Americain

Thank God for Charlie Kaufman. Usually, a handful of intelligent, original, daring and, most importantly, good independent movies are released each year. However, it is hard to find an at least semi-widely distributed Hollywood movie, starring big name actors, sharing all of those characteristics, especially since the Cohen brothers and Kevin Smith seem to have lost their edge. But writer Charlie Kaufman has delivered with Being John Malkovich (****), Adaptation (***�) and now Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Eternal Sunshine tells the story of Joel Barrish�s (Jim Carey) decision to remove all memory of his ex-girlfriend (Kate Winslet), but a number of other stories creep in over the course of the movie. It starts slowly and after about fifteen minutes I was worried that it was going to be a �smart� but boring movie. However, showing a patience that is nearly non-existent in movies these days, the story slowly builds to a crescendo. There are few wasted scenes and the peripheral characters become increasingly relevant, in an almost Dickensian fashion of interconnectedness, as the full story unfolds. This is a very effective style of storytelling and I wish more movies employed it. But, alas, it appears Hollywood does not think the modern moviegoer has such patience.

The acting is phenomenal. Jim Carey is excellent and surprisingly effective playing a non-comedic, somewhat mousy character and Kate Winslet also delivers a strong performance as Clementine. The supporting cast is also great, including Tom Wilkinson, a nerdy looking Mark Ruffalo, Elijah Wood (without any close-ups of his eyes) and Kirsten Dunst, who is excellent as always (and as an added bonus we get a scene with her in her skivvies jumping up and down on a bed � and it doesn�t even seem gratuitous).

The story is interesting, funny, sad, heart tugging and uplifting at various different times. However, I did feel that there was more there that could have been mined, which is why Eternal Sunshine ultimately gets the (***�) rating rather than the elusive four stars. Also, the final twist, while good, unfortunately also made the actual ending a little forced.

We need more movies like this, but the marketing for Eternal Sunshine has been unimpressive. I had no desire to see this movie after seeing the previews and didn�t change my mind until I learned it was written by Charlie Kaufman and saw its 92% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. While I do think a better job could have been done marketing Eternal Sunshine, it is an unfortunate reality that it is much easier to market a formulaic, overly simplistic piece of crap than a complex and original movie. Eternal Sunshine is only on pace to make about $35 million. I encourage everyone to vote with their feet and then spread the word � unless of course you only like formulaic crap.

Read Less...

Always hard to tell whether, in a country like Iraq, violence and dissidence is wide spread, or whether a few incidents blow things out of proportion. But the shooting, burning, beating, parading and hanging of non-military foreign nationals by cheering Iraqis seems like something a hell of a lot more than just radical extremists.

Warning! The video footage is fairly graphic.

Always hard to tell whether, in a country like Iraq, violence and dissidence is wide spread, or whether a few incidents blow things out of proportion. But the shooting, burning, beating, parading and hanging of non-military foreign nationals by cheering Iraqis seems like something a hell of a lot more than just radical extremists.

Warning! The video footage is fairly graphic.

According to the New York Times, the streets of the Iraqi city of Falluja “were thick with men and boys and chaos.”

Rumors always abound that David Stern has a little extra influence over what happens in the NBA. Granted, a San Antonio vs. N.J. finals demonstrates that he is not in complete control, but here are my picks for how the early playoff mix will shake down ... if it happens, you know who to thank.

#1 Indiana vs. #8N.Y.: Indy has locked up the #1 seed, but the Knicks occupy the #7 spot, by � a game. Look for them to slide to the 8th spot so we can have one more go around of Reggie and Spike.

Rumors always abound that David Stern has a little extra influence over what happens in the NBA. Granted, a San Antonio vs. N.J. finals demonstrates that he is not in complete control, but here are my picks for how the early playoff mix will shake down ... if it happens, you know who to thank.

#1 Indiana vs. #8N.Y.: Indy has locked up the #1 seed, but the Knicks occupy the #7 spot, by � a game. Look for them to slide to the 8th spot so we can have one more go around of Reggie and Spike.

According to Two Dimes, my AQs was only a very slight favorite against Pauly’s A8o and Mean Gene’s 72o (note: I made up the suits b/c I don’t recall what they were exactly, but that shouldn’t make a significant difference in the numbers):

pokenum -h ad qd - ac 8s - 7c 2d
Holdem Hi: 1370754 enumerated boards
cards win %win lose %lose tie %tie EV
Ad Qd 699211 51.01 609537 44.47 62006 4.52 0.532
8s Ac 279729 20.41 1029019 75.07 62006 4.52 0.226
7c 2d 329808 24.06 1035373 75.53 5573 0.41 0.242

Figuring my odds were better than that, but also knowing my odds would be much better heads up, I bet to try and get Mean Gene out. If Gene had noticed me, he says he would have folded, leaving me with this pretty little picture:

pokenum -h ad qd - ac 8s —7d 2c as
Holdem Hi: 990 enumerated boards containing As 2c 7d
cards win %win lose %lose tie %tie EV
Ad Qd 844 85.25 111 11.21 35 3.54 0.870
8s Ac 111 11.21 844 85.25 35 3.54 0.130

But, it was not to be, so instead this was the picture:

pokenum -h ad qd - ac 8s - 7c 2d —7d 2c as
Holdem Hi: 903 enumerated boards containing As 2c 7d
cards win %win lose %lose tie %tie EV
Ad Qd 227 25.14 672 74.42 4 0.44 0.254
8s Ac 94 10.41 805 89.15 4 0.44 0.106
7c 2d 578 64.01 325 35.99 0 0.00 0.640

So, Mean Gene becomes nearly a 2 to 1 favorite, and pulls of one of the most spectacular bad beats I’ve seen. But even pre-flop, Gene had almost 3 to 1 odds (where Pauly had closer to 4 to 1). Whereas asphnxma’s (fuck it, from now on he is simply Harold) QQs got beat by QJo, which was nearly a 6 to 1 dog—a much badder beat.

I mention this because it underscores the mathematics behind a fundamental tenet of poker: the more you know about the other hands, the more successful you will be. So don’t just look at your AK, or QQ, and bet the house—and don’t put someone else on, say, JJ pre-flop, and then keep it there when their actions suggest A2, A7, or—god forbid—72.

Read Less...

Isn’t this taking things a little far? CBS bleeped Janet Jackson for saying Jesus on Letterman. Of course, this might actually make Pat Robertson fun to watch.

Isn’t this taking things a little far? CBS bleeped Janet Jackson for saying Jesus on Letterman. Of course, this might actually make Pat Robertson fun to watch.

Sorry I’m not a sexy room service mama, but I do have new blog news!

Last Tuesday brought another game at Ferrari’s with a familiar cast. Pauly already wrote the game up at Tao but strangely focused on his own hands, so I guess it’s up to me to write about my own.

I also have some poker blog shoutouts.

My game, I have been told is too tight. I throw away things others at the table play (and win with) and while I am a consistent winner in the home games, my wins tend to be modest. I will make this one time a Rounders reference because it is fairly accurate: I am Knish. I don’t make a living at this, so the comparison isn’t perfectly apt, but the movie treatment of Knish seems to be on the ball. Low risk. Steady +EV. Tight. Dispensing advice that, in all honesty, should be taken. Knish is a great character, but I needed to change my game a little if I was going to have any real success at the table. So I did.

For the first time I really played position. I went for the blinds. I loosened up (for me) in late position. I bet middle pair when I felt that I was playing against nothing but overcards and draws. It was a new Ugarte and for a while things were going well. I started strong and was up early. I’m not a note-taker like Pauly, so I don’t know what my early evening high water mark was, but I do know that the table noticed that I was in more hands than usual.

The early profits quickly dissipated, though. since I spent most of the night in a cloud. Even my early success didn’t snap me back to earth, and my ethereal play became the subject of serious ribbing. As readers by now know, I am a stickler for poker etiquette. I consider the rules of the table a sign of respect to your opponents, and a repeated breaking of those rules a signal that you just don’t give a fuck about those around you. So when I bet out of turn, you know something is fucked up. I stared at the cards when it was my turn to deal. I fumed internally at how long it was taking Ferrari to bet only to find that he had mucked his cards preflop, and it was me that the table was waiting for. Even Ferrari was zinging shit off of me but I was too addled to fight back. (NB: While he’d kick my ass if I stepped to him with malice aforethought, I would strongly suggest that you bet on me if it comes to an insult battle.)

The cards weren’t coming ... unless I laid down my hand or they were accompanied by a board too scary to play. The strength that I showed early wasn’t carrying over, and either my chips were dwindling or the felt was rising; either way, it wasn’t good. If Ferrari’s buy in was the same $60 that seems de rigeur at the other home games I play in, I would have had to rebuy. Fortunately, an angel smiled upon me. Having actually found the felt in front of him, Coach decided to pack it in and just as he left, Marie arrived. Her arrival changed the vibe at the game dramatically and for the better. A pretty girl (um, woman) will do that.

Of course, pretty and dainty aren’t the same thing. Nothing says “treat me like one of the guys” like dropping a c-bomb on the table, but that is just what our fair Marie did. I can’t even remember the context. All I know is that “cunt” rolled off of her lips in an always-classy British accent and almost knocked me out of my chair. Still, I was on the button (for 2/4 HE, 6 handed), and since position-conscious was the rule of the day for me and there were no limpers in front of me, that includes throwing a steal raise at the blinds with Q9. And in her first hand on the table, Marie reraised me! Cussing like a sailor and reraising out of the chute. Not a woman to be fucked with. Well, I guess I have to see the flop… Q-K-x. She checks to me, so I bet my middle pair and ... god damnit she checkraised me! I shouldn’t have called, but I decided that since I had never seen her play before, I had to know if she was bluffing. Whatever came on the turn and the river, I was prepared to pay the likely $10 to see her cards. The turn was low, and as expected she bet and I called. But the river was a 9. I decided not to raise, since I didn’t want to see KQ. I didn’t. Marie flipped over QJo and I found myself with a pot I didn’t deserve after a lucky river.

Ferrari’s game changed also. He was a quiet killer all night. He won $186 but I can’t remember a single hand he pulled (except the four tens in Anaconda). But when Marie sat down, his game became an entirely different animal. He bet hard into Marie on what seemed like (but probably wasn’t) three hands in a row. Only once did he call Marie on the river to see her cards (and he mucked that hand also). Ferrari is obsessed with pot odds. Specifically, he is aware that once the pot reaches a certain level in a low-limit game, the call on the river is almost a no-brainer. It is hard to know exactly what he was trying to do. I thought that he was just dumping hands to Marie and I told him so after the game. He claims that he was trying to bully her with rags and dumped on the river when the bullying didn’t work. He implores me to believe him because he is “too honest for his own good.” But I just can’t. It isn’t because I think he is a liar; it is because I think he is a poker player. The least he can give me is that he went on tilt for a while. We’ll see what he says. (We always see what he says.)

My lucky river 9 and Ferrari’s “lost period” woke me up. I started playing real poker again. Omaha/8 was very kind to me and I won a lot off of Pauly in a game of 7card stack and roll when I was dealt a ♥ flush to the K. Pauly claimed to have a ♠ flush to the Q but ... he didn’t show it. You know what? Pauly’s a poker player too.

After my late night bounceback I cashed out +57 - a distant second to Ferrari, but a damn sight better than the night started.

Poker blog stuff

Felicia Lee set up a tournament for the blogger community at Planet Poker. At the time of this writing (1:15AM, well before I am setting this entry to go live) I know that Rick, Pauly and Mean Gene played and I expect to see writeups from all of them.

Update: You can start with Rick’s. Then you can read Felicia’s. And big ups to Genius of the Poker (who is not Boy Genius) who won the damn thing.

Mean Gene called some serious bullshit on Phil Hellmuth’s nonsense advice to business leaders. I admit that Hellmuth can play some poker. He wouldn’t be on TV at final table as much as he is if he couldn’t walk the walk. Still, it is good that he is being taken to the woodshed because he is a Grade A windbag.

Jeremy at Love and Casino War is giving away Poker Tracker software to someone willing to admit to fishitude. I have no pride, so I threw my hat into the ring.

Last, and certainly not least, Stephen Elliott, the writer whose home game write-ups inspired this ‘umble blog, is almost back. Back in SF after finishing numerous projects, including the promotional work for his book Happy Baby he promises to begin playing and reporting again. He started by posting a great tournament report by fellow writer Jamie Berger, so click the “home game write-ups” link. It is well worth it.

Read Less...

National Security Advisor Condoleeza Rice is happy to talk about the Bush administration’s handling of the terrorist threat—as long as it isn’t under oath.

I believe the Commission should be required to draw an adverse inference.

Last night was the first of the weekly Poker Journal Keepers at Planet Poker organized by Felicia. Felicia and Planet Poker get the booby prizes, and Mean Gene is my new hero.

Felicia deserves extra special poker props for having personally worked with everyone to make sure they got signed up (including yours truly, whose problem was he hadn’t funded his account yet!). She also gets the booby prize for being first knocked out (her QQ got “cracked” by AA in the first or second hand of the game).

Other than stealing the blinds once, I only played two hands before getting knocked out. The first was a pre-flop raise by Pauly to which everyone folded. Knowing Pauly as I do, and holding A8s in one of the blinds, I called the raise. Flop was x-8-x, I check, and Pauly, no doubt concerned by my call, makes a modest bet. I call. Turn = 8. Gotcha, Pauly! Check, $200 bet, $600 raise, pause, call. The river comes and brings a possible flush (but not mine). I check, Pauly checks back. 888 wins, Pauly mucks. My guess is Pauly had something like Q7o.

The only other hand I played to showdown was spectacular. I’m sitting with AQs in last position, and Pauly goes all-in with his short stack (see hand above). I call, figuring him for—at best—Ax. Mean Gene also calls, which gets me worried. The flop comes 7 - 2 - A. I figure I’ve got Pauly dead to rights, and Mean Gene doesn’t have Aces or AK, so I’m golden. I bet into Gene to get him out, but he goes all in, typing something like “I’ve got to do it”. It occured to me that he might have the hammer, but only Pauly would call a $900 raise with the hammer, right? So, figuring him for something like JJ, I call (It occurs to me now that he might have had 77—folding would have left me with about $1900, enough to stay in it for a while; I should have folded, and I should have read that comment for what it was: a clear tell he had the hammer). Turn and river helped no-one, and Pauly and I both went out to the Hammer. Pauly had A8. As I told Mean Gene last night, he is my new hero.

I didn’t stick around because I had to get up early this morning, so I don’t know who won, but check out the links in our Gambling Room for other players’ updates on the game.

A word about Planet Poker, whose interface has some nice touches (the “Tourney Info” feature is one of the more useful ones around), but wins the booby prize for having made poor use of avatars. I was a slim blonde with a peekaboo blue sequined dress (how did they know?), Pauly was a short-haired brunette, The Fat Guy had a sassy little pony tail, and Hdouble won the “hottest redhead at the table” award. Also, a cackling woman’s laugh emanates from your computer speakers whenever anyone types “lol”, and—oddly—a flushing sound when you type “loo” (don’t ask me why people where typing “loo").

Read Less...

The Bush/Cheney campaign website created the “Sloganator” a DIY poster-design program that allowed you to insert campaign slogans into a stock Bush/Cheney ‘04 placard. The problems for B/C began almost immediately, as liberals jumped at the chance to stick it to the campaign. The campaign had to constantly revise the program to screen out references like “fascism” or “Stupid” (twice!) and then had to fight off a hack that, regardless of what one typed in, generated, e.g., “No Ass Fucking” as the slogan on the final product. The best of the slogans have been collected and put to music by Bluetooth Against Bush.

Enjoy. If that link isn’t working, enjoy it here.

Thanks to Wonkette and Daniel Radosh for the links.

Where the Battle of Algiers rages on ...Rick's Cafe Americain

Charles Star's Gigs

Charles Is Busy

The Green Room

The Usual Suspects

The Game Room

The "Real" Rick's Cafe

Categories

Monthly Archives

Recently

Syndicate The Cafe

Syndicate The Grovel

Join Charles' Mailing List

Search

Statistics